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[Now accepting new clients.  Book your free consultation today → ](/work-with-me)

[![Sharon Meyers Therapy logo](/assets/logo-sanddollar-B1yhAvCA.png)Sharon Meyers Therapy LCSW #106887 ](/)

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![A fogged bathroom mirror with one wiped-clear streak](/assets/gaslighting-C6r9Wi0J.jpg)

Therapy for

# Recovering from Gaslighting 

The hardest part is not the fights. It is that you no longer trust your own account of them.

When someone consistently rewrites what happened, you eventually start outsourcing reality to them, and that is very difficult to walk back on your own.

## Learning to Trust Your Own Perception Again 

You remember the conversation clearly, and then they say it never happened that way, and they say it so calmly that you assume the error must be yours.

Do that a few hundred times and something in you goes quiet. You stop asserting. You check your reaction against theirs before you allow yourself to have it.

Recovery starts with rebuilding that internal signal. In session we go back over specific incidents and practice something simple and surprisingly hard: you say what you experienced, and it stands.

## The Exhaustion of Documenting Your Own Life 

Many people describe saving texts, keeping notes, recording calls, or replaying a conversation on the drive home so they can hold onto their version of it.

It is a reasonable response to an unreasonable situation, and it costs an enormous amount of energy. You are essentially running a legal defense of your own memory, full time.

Even after the relationship ends, the habit does not switch off. People overexplain, gather evidence before making a simple request, and apologize preemptively. We work on lowering that guard at a pace that feels safe rather than reckless.

## What the Work Looks Like 

We start with what actually happened, in your words, without anyone editing it. Then we look at what it taught you to do, and which of those strategies you still need.

Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, we make room for the self-doubt without letting it drive, and we practice acting on your own judgment in small, low-stakes ways until it starts to feel like yours again.

This is not about deciding whether the other person meant it. It is about you getting your footing back.

## Related Reading

-   [People-Pleasing Read more → ](/therapy-for/people-pleasing)
-   [Adult Children of Narcissistic Parents Read more → ](/therapy-for/adult-children-of-narcissists)
-   [Emotionally Immature Parents Read more → ](/therapy-for/emotionally-immature-parents)

Sharon Meyers is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker offering telehealth sessions to adults located anywhere in California.

In Case of Emergency

This website is for informational purposes only. This practice is not a crisis service. If you are experiencing a mental health emergency, please do not wait for a reply.

-   Call [911](tel:911) or go to your nearest emergency room if you are in immediate danger.
-   Call or text [988](tel:988) to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
-   Text HOME to [741741](sms:741741) to reach the Crisis Text Line.

## Your version of what happened is worth taking seriously. 

Schedule a free consultation to begin.

[Schedule a Free Consultation](/begin-here)

### Sharon Meyers Therapy

LCSW #106887  
Online therapy throughout California  
Office located in Berkeley, CA

Quick Links

-   [Home](/)
-   [About](/about)
-   [Specialties](/specialties)
-   [FAQ](/faq)
-   [Blog](/blog)
-   [Contact](/begin-here)
-   [Therapy For](/therapy-for)
-   [Online Therapy](/online-therapy)
-   [Guides](/guides)

Contact

-   [(415) 335-7446](tel:4153357446)
-   [sharon@sharonmeyerstherapy.com](mailto:sharon@sharonmeyerstherapy.com)

[Psychology Today](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/sharon-meyers-berkeley-ca/1080260)

**In case of emergency:** call or text [988](tel:988) or go to your nearest emergency room. This website is for informational purposes only.

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