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[Now accepting new clients.  Book your free consultation today → ](/work-with-me)

[![Sharon Meyers Therapy logo](/assets/logo-sanddollar-B1yhAvCA.png)Sharon Meyers Therapy LCSW #106887 ](/)

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![A pill organizer, notepad and cup of tea on a kitchen counter at night](/assets/caregiver-stress-LYsmnOq8.jpg)

Therapy for

# Caregiver Stress 

You are raising children and caring for a parent at the same time, and somewhere in the middle of everyone else's needs, your own life has been quietly shelved.

Caregivers almost never call it caregiving. They call it helping out, which is part of why they wait until they are breaking to ask for support.

## The Sandwich Generation 

Your mother needs the pharmacy, your daughter needs the college forms, your job needs you back from lunch, and all of it is genuinely urgent. There is no slack in the system. The system is you.

The arithmetic does not work and everyone can see it except the people you are caring for, which produces a specific loneliness: you are surrounded by family all day and supported by no one.

We work on the actual load, what can be delegated, paid for, refused, or simply done worse, because a caregiver who collapses helps no one.

## Resenting Someone You Love 

Here is the sentence caregivers are most afraid to say: sometimes you resent them. The parent you are bathing. The spouse you are managing medications for. The person whose illness has reorganized your entire life.

Resentment in caregiving is not a character flaw. It is the predictable result of an unreasonable amount of responsibility carried alone, and saying it out loud in therapy is often the first relief people feel in months.

Love and resentment are not opposites. You can be furious about the situation and devoted to the person in the same afternoon, and most caregivers are.

## The Self That Got Shelved 

Caregiving does not just take your time. Over months and years it takes your friendships, your health appointments, your ambitions, your sense of being a person with a future rather than a function.

Many caregivers describe not knowing what they want anymore when asked, because wanting has been irrelevant for so long the muscle has gone quiet.

Part of our work is reoccupying your own life in small, defended ways, before the caregiving ends, so that when it does end there is someone left to live it.

## Related Reading

-   [Anticipatory Grief Read more → ](/therapy-for/anticipatory-grief)
-   [Burnout Read more → ](/therapy-for/burnout)
-   [Codependency Read more → ](/therapy-for/codependency)

Sharon Meyers is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker offering telehealth sessions to adults located anywhere in California.

In Case of Emergency

This website is for informational purposes only. This practice is not a crisis service. If you are experiencing a mental health emergency, please do not wait for a reply.

-   Call [911](tel:911) or go to your nearest emergency room if you are in immediate danger.
-   Call or text [988](tel:988) to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
-   Text HOME to [741741](sms:741741) to reach the Crisis Text Line.

## You cannot pour from an empty cup, and you should not have to try. 

Schedule a free consultation. This hour is for you.

[Schedule a Free Consultation](/begin-here)

### Sharon Meyers Therapy

LCSW #106887  
Online therapy throughout California  
Office located in Berkeley, CA

Quick Links

-   [Home](/)
-   [About](/about)
-   [Specialties](/specialties)
-   [FAQ](/faq)
-   [Blog](/blog)
-   [Contact](/begin-here)
-   [Therapy For](/therapy-for)
-   [Online Therapy](/online-therapy)
-   [Guides](/guides)

Contact

-   [(415) 335-7446](tel:4153357446)
-   [sharon@sharonmeyerstherapy.com](mailto:sharon@sharonmeyerstherapy.com)

[Psychology Today](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/sharon-meyers-berkeley-ca/1080260)

**In case of emergency:** call or text [988](tel:988) or go to your nearest emergency room. This website is for informational purposes only.

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